*Cough*
My cough shows no sign of abating, I believe it may be TB. That'd be a bit rubbish actually, I've been inoculated against the disease twice. Maybe it's like a double negative, they cancel each other out and mean you end up with TB.
Hmmm, if that was the case then with just a box of polio vaccine and a syringe I could make the 'iron lung' the summer fashion accessory in Preston.
Jesus, I've just remembered one of the moments in my life when I just wanted to crawl into a corner and die.
I went to see Jack Dee at the guild hall a couple of years ago with my friend Steve and some of his other mates. I didn't know any of the others but thought that I'd win them over by scribbling a joke on the pad of paper that Jack Dee left out for "feedback". I told them that it was a joke that started with the line "How do you turn a seven stone weakling into a 15 stone ironman?"
Well, at the end Dee flicked through the pad and read my joke out. When he read the punchline "Polio" he apologised to the audience. A few people gasped in horror and several of the people I was sat with looked at me with disgust in their eyes. I sank low into my seat and when everybody went to the pub afterwards I made my excuses and crawled off home. Heh, I don't like Jack Dee as much as I used to, even though it was in poor taste, I feel he was overly harsh. I guess I thought that as nobody really gets polio anymore that it’s okay to make jokes about it. Bastards, next time I'll hold the line up for about two hours as I write the full length version of the "orange for a head" joke.
We saw Kill Bill Part 2 last week. I thought the first half of it was great, yet the last chapter chucked away pretty much all that the last film and a half had achieved. It was a disappointing ending and ever so slightly saccharine. I guess I wanted more blood and guts. It could have been a genious one-part film though.
We also saw Eternal Sunshine Of The Spotless Mind which I thought was divine. It was beautifully directed by the untouchable Michael Gondry and I've never seen Jim Carrey act as well as that before. I just thought it was really sweet. It was written, acted and directed with a lightness of touch; it was subtle yet affecting. Just a beautiful beautiful film about love and every aspect of it.
We went to DB Mex on Friday night. Yom! I got bullied as usual though.
On Saturday we gathered to watch Braindead, Evil Dead 2 and The Return Of The Living Dead, whilst playing the Zombies!!! boardgame. It was ZOMBIE NIGHT!
It was all rather last-minute and we couldn't gather as many as we wanted, we ended up having too many anyway, Marie had to sit out (she fell asleep) from the game. Poor Marie. Next time, we'll have everybody around and try to arrange some sort of crazy multi-zombie extravaganza.
The game actually went on way too long, it can be quite a good short game, but because none of us had really played it that much we just ended up trying to ruin everybody else's chances of winning rather than trying to win it ourselves. Which says a lot about us. Just as anybody got near the helicopter to escape, somebody else would smother them in zombies or make them wander off in the wrong direction.
I *heart* Braindead. Without fail it puts a stupid grin on my face and makes me laugh like a mental. It is so spectacularly gory yet funny and childish. Everything a film should be. The bit at the end when the hero of the story chops up about fifty zombies with a lawnmower is one of my favourite scenes from a film.
My parents turned up on Saturday with a really odd gift. They had bought me a set of kitchen knives. That doesn't sound that odd but you have to see them. They are the most viciously sharp set of knives I've ever seen and they come in this horrific leather briefcase, that looks like it's made from human skin. To top it all off the knife set includes a meat cleaver and some evil looking forks. I think I should keep it locked and hidden, I may get drunk one night and end up becoming Preston's very own "Glenn The Ripper".
I'm quite enjoying the Delays album, I think it's quite nice. I do worry on some tracks that I may be somehow listening to Cast by accident, but overall it seems quite cool. It is a bit out of place in the current music scene, I think the album was made in 1996 and somebody forgot to release it until now. Maybe that's why I like it.
The last Easyworld album has been officially upgraded in my head to 'ace'.
I'm gonna miss The Superkings gig tonight, which I feel kind of bad about. I feel like having a night in though, so I feel well enough for the Joy Zipper gig tomorrow. We may have problems there as well as the clutch or gearbox in my car is starting to fail. I hope it's the clutch, please be the least expensive thing. It does mean though that I struggle to get in and out of second gear.
