I can't really tell how Tuesday went, at least not until next Wednesday. We arrived at Anfield quite early and the initial signs seemed promising. I couldn't pick up the couple of Liverpool/Juventus scarves that I wanted as everywhere was sold out of them. Everywhere you looked, people were sporting a scarf emblazoned with the names of both teams, or wearing Juventus shirts and hats.
We walked where the Juventus supporters were queuing outside the ground and people were mixing freely, like they do at home games in the Premiership. It all looked good and we even found time to wander next to Johnny Barnes. He looks less tubby in real life.
When we got into the ground it became clear that things may not go 100% as planned. Supporters of both clubs attempted to present a banner to the Juventus fans, celebrating friendship and commemorating what happened. A significant portion of the supporters turned their backs on this gesture, giving the middle-finger behind their backs. Some fans clapped but these were quickly shouted down.
Then, during the minute silence for the popey and the victims in 1985, a large mosaic was unveiled on The Kop that consisted of the word in Italian for 'friendship'. Some of the Juventus fans clapped in approval of this, but those who had earlier turned their backs started shouting them down.
As the game started and some of the goodwill from the Liverpool fans seemed to evaporate, I wondered what it all meant.
We can't expect that all Juventus fans will accept an apology for what happened. Those affected by what happened will probably always hold a grudge and I can understand that. What was noticeable about those who were opposed to any reconciliation though, was that they were mostly the young, obstreperous and vociferous element you see amongst any group of football supporters. Young men aren't the best at apologising for anything, and sadly a lot of them still mistake football for a war. These people would probably hate us even if nothing had happened, that something terrible did, just gave validation to their hate.
Italian football still has problems with supporters and hooliganism. It seems to be a problem that they refuse to fully acknowledge, which means that very little action is taken against it.
There will be a lot more of these supporters in Turin next week and I fear for any Liverpool supporters going out there. The Italian police will probably do as little as they always have, and I sadly think that people may be hurt. That I think we'll have got off lightly if nobody is seriously hurt or killed shows that I don't hold out much hope for football being the only talking point after the game.
There was a small element of Liverpool support that didn't want to go OTT in the efforts for repentance and friendship last week. Mostly young men who didn't want their masculinity threatened by actually being forced onto the defensive, they claimed that to say sorry was to actually admit that it was our fault. Well, I wasn't there in 1985 and neither were many of these people, but the supporters of our football club were partly responsible for the death of innocent people. We should say sorry for our part in it. It is not up to us to apologise for the other factors that led to the tragedy. We should be big enough to apologise, and we were on Tuesday night.
Sadly, the number of fans thinking we went too far has swelled and become further entrenched in their opinion by what happened on Tuesday. I think some people are hurt at what they see as a 'snub' by the Juventus fans. Whether our apology and offer of friendship is accepted or not, the important point is that we made the offer.

We've managed to get free tickets for The Manics/Delays gig tomorrow night in Liverpool. We have to work for it though, but hopefully in a fun way. We shall be Ministers of Delays Propaganda tomorrow evening, responsible for signing people up to the band newsletter and distributing a frightening amount of flyers around the venue.
I dreamt about it last night, and ended up getting punched by a security man who thought I was handing out flyers for Tesco. I love how my brain has a mild worry about how something will play-out, but decides to torment me with ridiculous scenarios when I should be having a peaceful sleep.
What was interesting (to me anyway) was that in the dream I actually enjoyed quite a lengthy set by The Manics. They played a lot of album tracks and B-sides, and missed out a lot of the hits. I think my brain was treating me to what would be a perfect set for me, playing a lot off The Holy Bible and missing out toss such as You Stole The Sun From My Heart. They also played a couple of new songs, which sounded quite good.
How?
How can I come up with an enjoyable melody and some slightly politicised rhyming couplets in my sleep? I actually genuinely seemed to enjoy these new songs. What were they? Paul McCartney once said that he dreamt the tune to Yesterday, was I also being given some stunning insight into a potential hit single? Well the Gods of Pop fucked up, as I can't remember how the tune went. It was good anyway. I promise.
I dreamt about this blog earlier in the week. I was dream-wondering about whether the white on blue colour scheme (that I had planned for Indietron) would work on here, or whether it would be too hard on the old peepers.
A dull dream maybe, but preferable to when I wake up at 3am with my stomach turning as I've dreamt about all the negative aspects of my life past and present colliding in one big nightmare of fear. Heh, I'm so sunny.

So, the election will be on the 5th of May. No surprise there.
If I still lived in Fleetwood then my choice would be simple. The Labour MP Joan Humble seems to be a decent, morally courageous and intelligent human being. She seems hugely focussed on the problems of her electorate, and from all reports seems to be an open and committed MP. The Blackpool North and Fleetwood constituency isn't an impenetrable Labour stronghold (mainly due to the fucking cretins who live in Cleveleys), so she's shown a strong character by not following the party line. She voted against the government on the war in Iraq, against the government on foundation hospitals and also said no to tuition fees. To see an MP standing up for what they believe in is quite refreshing. I will be upset and angry if she loses.
The Labour MP in Preston sits in one of the most comfortable seats around, yet he's a fucking 'yes' man. Jesus, this man is a backer in pretty much everything I dislike about this government.
I haven't got a clue what to do then. I'll probably weight things up on what people have to say and then decide then.
I'll tell you something though, I don't want to live in a country that would put that fucking horrendous shower of cunts that call themselves The Conservative Party in power.
I grew up in a left-wing family and my distaste for them was ingrained early on, but fucking hell, how I detest everything about them now.
Cunts. Cunts. Cunts.

I'm going for a lie down.

I wrote something in this blog last year about a guy in our office, who stayed late one night when I was on a late shift. I can't remember where it is. It's not important really. Anyway, he's one of the higher management types, but seems different from the sneery tossers that inhabit management roles at BAe.
I just bumped into him in the kitchen and he seemed to be fascinated about my Super Furry Animals cup, and that it changes colour when you put hot liquid into it.

Jesus, that was such a Karl-esque anecdote.

I just saw a big billboard down Brook Street, which said something like "It's about time we put a limit on immigration". It was an election advert for the Conservative party. Even though I wrote that lengthy blog entry a couple of weeks ago about how the political parties would pander to the bigotries and prejudices of the ignorant, I was still slightly shocked by seeing it in on a wall.
Is this what people care about? Is this the most important thing in peoples lives? This country frightens me sometimes. Then again, I think most countries frighten me in similar ways.
At the bottom of this poster was written what I assume is the slogan the Conservatives will be using this year; "Are you thinking what we're thinking?"
I doubt that the people in the Conservative party are thinking what I'm thinking. I wish they were though, I'm thinking they should kill themselves in a painful way. ARE YOU THINKING WHAT I'M THINKING?
I'm guessing that there are a series of slogans which will be popped up around the country up until the Election Day. Hmm, here are some Conservative slogans that you may spot around the country…

"It's about time we gassed poor people."

"It's about time the working class were prevented from voting."

"It's about time we stopped people from freely following their own religion and culture, and made them take up traditional British pursuits such as fighting outside pubs."

"It's about time we stopped people coming to our country, even though our own party leaders father wouldn't have been allowed into this country if our proposed immigration laws were in place back then."

Hmm, those last two may not fit on the billboard.
I expect the Labour posters will probably contain a picture of Tony Blair cutting down some Iraqi children with a sub-machine gun, with the words "Aren't you proud?" written at the bottom in a nice font, maybe 14 point News Gothic.
Probably not. A simple "Look, I know we're shit but the other lot are downright fucking frightening" would probably work for a lot of people.

In the seventies and eighties, football in the UK (and large parts of Europe) was being torn apart by hooliganism. It even feels strange to look back at the days of my childhood now, when a story made the news every couple of weeks about a set of fans rioting in a stadium or town centre. Attendances were dropping and football was in danger of falling apart at the seams.
Even though 1989 saw the Hillsborough disaster, that was borne out of terrible policing and inadequate organisation; the low point for hooliganism came in 1985.
May 1985 saw the Bradford City disaster, when the rickety wooden stand at Bradford's Valley Parade ground caught light and was then consumed by fire horrifically quickly. About 50 people died, most trapped by locked turnstiles when trying to escape. On that same day, a young fan was killed in Birmingham (I think), when a wall collapsed during rioting by fans.
Just weeks later, Liverpool played Juventus in the European Cup Final in Brussels. It was probably inevitable that there would be trouble of some sort, but not to the level that actually occurred. There was rioting in the ground and fighting between the two sets of supporters. I won't go into the detail but Juventus fans fleeing from the trouble were pressed up against a wall, which then collapsed. 39 people were killed as people were crushed in their desire to escape the fighting.
The game was played (to prevent further trouble), but English clubs were banned from playing in European competitions indefinitely (the ban ended for the 1991 season).
Tomorrow sees the first meeting of Liverpool and Juventus since that day and I'll be there at Anfield for the home leg. The game has brought up a lot of feelings about what happened 20 years ago.
Even though I was only 10 when I watched the tragedy unfold at home on TV, I still remember the shock of what happened. I couldn't really watch the game, I was full of confused feelings. I was a 10 year old boy who was obsessed in Liverpool FC, yet I found it odd that I didn't really care about the game. That had never happened before.
Bridges were built between the two football clubs after what happened, but it never fully involved the fans. A lot of Juventus fans still hate Liverpool for what happened, and I'm expecting that there will be some trouble in Turin next week for the return game. I'd love for it to pass peacefully, but human nature probably won't allow it. Even though the people who died weren't directly killed by the hands of any fan, they died whilst trying to flee Liverpool supporters. I perfectly understand that they'll hate us. I'm also aware that I just used that particular pronoun.Us.
I wasn't there that night, and I'm guessing that in a crowd of over 40 thousand that only a handful of people will be there who were involved in the trouble on that night. Yet I feel it is time that the supporters of Liverpool football club actually just said 'sorry'.
Liverpool supporters felt guilt afterwards, but it was mixed up with the other feelings that usually come with the shame of guilt - denial and attributing blame to others.
It is true that the Heysel stadium was a wreck and shouldn't have held the continents premiere football spectacle. It is true that Juventus fans were also rioting on that night, and that Liverpool fans still held grudges from the treatment given to them by Rome police the year before (and I know all about the police of Rome). Yes, it's also true that the Belgian police that night were wholly incompetent, but these are just reasons which added to the likelihood for disaster. Nobody would have died if Liverpool fans hadn't have charged the small Juve contingent in Section Z that night. It wasn't the Juventus hooligans who fought back that died, it was those escaping the trouble.
Whatever the reasons, it is important that tomorrow night is about friendship and repentance. I'm excited about the game tomorrow and really hope we win but it is not the most important thing.
We are sorry for what happened, and hope that some of the pain and grievances held over from that night can be eased tomorrow.